It can be a disappointing and de-motivating to set yourself business goals that are not achieved. It can make you lose faith in yourself if you feel you can’t do what you know you should too. Or if you feel like you are not confident to stand up and implement change.
You most likely just need some guidance and support getting there.
See if any of these sound familiar- are these things you are tolerating?
Incomplete tasks, too many meetings, clutter, unmet needs, unresolved issues or problems, other people’s or your own behavior and demands, crossed boundaries, a list of “shoulds”, guilt, debt, lack of sales, procrastination, poor concentration, confidence issues, unhealthy eating/sleeping/exercise habits, your own story you tell yourself, online/ social media pressure, overwhelm of tasks, financial pressures, family issues… the list goes on ad will be different for each of you.
Ever ask yourself why it is so hard? Always debating things in your mind?
You just want to get things done, avoid difficult situations and get along with people in your business and family, right?
You want to be fair and patient in your business and life, that’s great – but don’t confuse this with tolerating what you shouldn’t.
Tolerations can block you from moving and keep you stuck in a pattern of repeating behaviours which take your nowhere apart from the same old spiral.
What is stopping you? What are you tolerating?
When you write things down and set your commitment to dealing with them, it works better than just sat in your head whirring around.
You are more likely to achieve your goals this way. Once you understand what is holding you back you can start to think about HOW to deal with them and HOW to move forward beyond these.
I had a client who was constantly tolerating the interruptions of others – and couldn’t say no either. So when she would get calls, she would answer them. An email, answer it. Meeting when maybe she didn’t need that or it wasn’t priority? Go to it. Extra work can you do this? Yes,ok.
This meant she was then later with prioritising her own work and deadlines and would find herself working more into the evening to meet her clients’ needs, that then ate into family time and she (and her family)got really frustrated – causing issues in her home life.
The thing is she hadn’t even realised it until she wrote it all down!
This simple written list will help you to identify what you are tolerating. You can keep this as a reminder to work on these things or you can use it in coaching and mentoring sessions to really work on the areas that are holding you back.
Sometimes it isn’t enough to know what you SHOULD do – you need and want accountability and support to get there.
Your list is an incredible base for your business growth and to really identify your own blocks. Imagine being able to smash these tolerations and actually get going on what you want, bit by bit. How would that look?
What could you achieve?
None of the changes happen overnight – no sorry, that would be too easy! Work and application is involved and more importantly, really understanding HOW you can change your mindset and set new patterns to become more productive and successful.
Too often, clients say ‘Oh that’s just the way I am’
It’s not just the way you are– writing off a behavior that isn’t helping you is a sign of now knowing how to change or approach the issues.
So, what can you do?
Start by taking answering this question “What is important to you?” or “What really matters in your world?”
When you realise what truly matters to you, you will look at the list in amazement as it will all make become clear.
Penny dropping stuff.
Once you know exactly where you place high importance in your life and why, it becomes much clearer where to take action. You don’t need to take massive action straightaway either; it is beneficial to start small and be really open to other possibilities and ways of doing things and behaving.
Ask yourself, “What actually happens if I decide to stop tolerating this? Do I lose anything truly valuable and if so how will I handle that?”
Really see the thought process through to show yourself what the impact would be. Often change we want gets stuck behind fear and even considering options can be hard, especially if there is impact.
One step at a time… is what I always say to my clients.
So, what specifically are you tolerating and why?
Write your list of your top 10 issues, think about them, post them in a place you will see your list every day.
Then ask yourself one simple question:
“WHY am I tolerating these and what can I do to change it?”